Wed, 16 August 2017
Topical jokes about Neo-Nazis, the KKK, and a woman who found her wedding ring on a carrot.
Show Transcript:Good morning, good afternoon, and goodnight. These are The Jokes for Today for August 16th.
The KKK has been denied a permit to burn a giant cross on top of a mountain. No reason was provided.
A Neo-Nazi website has been forced offline after they were banned from several webhosting services. Currently, the only website posting Nazi propaganda is Whitehouse.gov
These were the jokes for today, and I, was Jonas Polsky.
Thu, 3 August 2017
After an extremely long hiatus, the Jokes for Today are BACK!
Topical jokes about: an island of garbage, the owner of Costco dying, stoners, and OJ Simpson getting out of prison.
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Show Transcript:Good morning, good afternoon, and goodnight. These are the jokes for today for August 3rd.
In extremely recent news:
OJ Simpson convinced a parole board to release him from prison. OJ made a pretty compelling argument to the parole board: he threatened to MURDER them.
OJ swore that if he was released from prison that he'd never commit another murder. The parole board reminded him that he was in prison for robbery.
Scientists have discovered a floating patch of garbage in the ocean, that's 1 and a half times the size of Texas. The biggest difference is that unlike Texas, people want to live on the island of garbage.
The founder of Costco has passed away. He died while making a sandwich, when he fell off of a stepladder, and drowned in a 600 gallon jar of mayonnaise.